Sonali SenRoy's Book

I had first heard about the Sonali - Rossellini story in 2008, when Dilip Padgaonkar's book, "Under Her Spell: Roberto Rossellini in India" had come out. 

Over the past 17 years, I have spent numerous days in libraries and archives, collecting information in English, Italian and French about their story. You can say that I am obsessed with it.

Today I received a book written by Sonali in 1961, that I had ordered. There was a surprise hidden in it. This post is about her book and the surprise. The image below shows Sonali from the back-cover of her book.

Let me start with a brief background about the Sonali-Rossellini story.

Brief Background About Sonali-Rossellini Story

The 1945 film, "Rome, Open City" created the legend of Italian film director Roberto Rossellini. At the end of 1956, Rossellini arrived in India to shoot a film. At that time, he was married to the Hollywood star Ingrid Bergman.

In India, he fell in love with Sonali Dasgupta, wife of film director Hari Dasgupta. There was a huge scandal. In October 1957, Rossellini and Sonali escaped to Paris with her younger son.

4 years later, in June 1961, Sonali wrote a book in French & Italian titled, Altro Mondo (the Other World).

Sonali's Book

I had heard about this book, but had not managed to lay hands on it. After so many years, a few days ago, while re-reading my old notes, I was reminded of this book and thought that now it might be possible to find it on internet. I found it straight away, and ordered a used-copy for a little more than three Euro.

Today morning that book arrived. It says that it was originally published in French and translated into Italian by Sonali herself, with the help of Mr. Dominique Aubier. It was published by Longanesi & C., Rome in June 1961. The cover has the picture of a woman from the Ajanta caves.

On the book, the author's name is Sonali Dasgupta. The first question in my mind was - why did she use this name for her book?

Sonali's maiden name was Senroy, and after her marriage to H. Dasgupta, she had become Sonali Dasgupta. When she had reached Paris in the beginning of October 1957, Roberto was still married to his second wife, Ingrid Bergman, and their legal separation was ratified in Rome in early November 1957. At the end of November 1957, their daughter Raffaella was born.

Thus, her choice of publishing her book as "Sonali Dasgupta" in 1961, probably meant that she and Roberto were not yet formally married. May be, at that time, her divorce with Hari Dasgupta was not formalised and thus she was forced to use that name, because it was on her official documents?

Surprise in the Book

I was surprised that the used copy of the book I have received, has a hand-written note in Italian by Sonali (click on the picture for a larger view): 

 "Questo libro non è l'opera di uno scrittore ma l'esperienza di una donna. La sincerità in esso racchiusa è la prova della simpatia e amicizia per tutto e tutti. Maggio 1961, Roma, Sonali Dasgupta."

(Trans.: This book is not the work of a writer but the experience of a woman. The sincerity in it, is the proof of sympathy and friendship for everything and everyone. May 1961, Rome, Sonali Dasgupta)

Sonali and her elder son Raja

The book is dedicated to Ragia (Raja), her elder son. In the book, the spellings of Raja are "Ragia", because Italian does not have J and it uses "gi" for the J sound. It is possible that she had given verbal instructions about the dedication and the person transcribing it had used the Italian spellings of the word. I feel that she must have been disappointed that her son's name was not spelled properly.

When I had first read about the Sonali and Roberto story, I had been greatly struck by her leaving of her elder son, Raja, in India, who was around 5 years old at that time. It had seemed to me like a "Sophie's Choice" kind of situation because a mother had been forced to take one child and to leave behind her other child.

I think that by dedicating this book to Raja Dasgupta, she was expressing her regret and pain at that separation.

Contents of the Book

The book is composed of 13 chapters. The first chapter starts with her days in Bombay immediately preceding her departure from India for Paris, with her young son Arjun (later he changed name and became Gil Rossellini). A couple of chapters have brief glimpses of her life in India such as about her birth in Banaras/Varanasi and her father's work as a doctor and about her journey to Europe.

Rest of the book is about her encounters with Europe, first with Paris and Saint Remy in France and then about her life in Italy. These encounters include linguistic difficulties, challenges of adapting to the western clothes, and the curiosity of people about the sari-wearing woman. In the parts about Italy, there are also different episodes of dealing with journalists and other curious persons.

The book does not touch on her love-story with Roberto and her life with her first husband. It reads like a series of vignettes, as if she was talking to someone about what it means for her to be an exotic Indian in Europe and to explain the peculiarities of India to the Europeans. The first draft of the book was probably written by that interviewer (Dominique Aubier), at a time when she didn't have a good command over French or Italian.

The book also shows her desire for dignity and privacy, for not giving in to journalists looking for melodramatic stories and scandals.

Conclusions

To find this book with her handwritten words in my hands was an incredible sensation. Suddenly, I could touch the words she had written and imagine her sitting at a table in a bookshop, writing dedications.

It seemed to me, as if across time and space, she has decided to extend her finger towards me, daring me to touch her.

I had written to her once to ask for an interview, but it was a time of bereavement and she had withdrawn from all public contacts at that time. She died in 2013.

I have been obsessed with this story for almost 2 decades. I have already written about it a few times and have been in contact with Raja Dasgupta, her elder son, as well as with a few other persons who knew her.

With all the material that I have collected about this story, I know that one day I will write a book about it. When I saw her handwriting today, I felt as if she is herself asking me to do it.

***

Mantra Photo Exhibition in Schio

During a recent evening walk, I visited a photo-exhibition at the beautiful Toaldi-Capra palace of Schio. The exhibition was titled Nel Mantra (In the Mantra) and it had stills from a short film made by a film-maker from Schio, Rocco Zaupa.

Photo-Exhibition

Many of the images in the exhibition were blurred, expressing motions and emotions, though from them it was difficult to make a rational idea about the film. At the beginning of the exhibition, a note explained that the underlying theme of the exhibition (and the film) was repetition, and thus the title, Nel Mantra, because a Mantra has to be repeated many times.

The images were from a short film about a film-shooting, in which a director named Gerda is directing two actresses. He makes them do the same scene again and again, till they are too tired to go on. This day of repetitions creates a kind of deep relationship between the director Gerda and one of the actresses called Anna.

Rocco Zaupa and Aurora Verducci

I had a brief interaction with Rocco and Aurora, two members of the team associated with the short film and this exhibition.

Rocco is from Schio, while Aurora is from Tuscany. They both met at the film school in Lucca (Tuscany).

They explained the basic idea of the film about repetition and how they can lead to the discovery of deeper meanings and connections. The images presented in the exhibition have been created from the videos they had shot for the film.

Comments

I can understand the idea of repetitions, by making you think and rethink of something, can lead you to see it from different angles and understand it better. It is a tiny idea and I am curious to see how they have translated this into an understanding of the relationship between two persons.

I think that even a decade ago, making a short-film on such a "tiny-sliver" of an idea and making an exhibition out of stills made from the video, would have been much more difficult, but today the technology helps to simplify everything and it is possible to take a wisp or a whisper, and make it germinate into something more substantial.

However, I am not sure if Mantra is the right word to express the act of repetitions leading to deeper or a different understanding, since Mantras are more about the sounds and not so much about meanings.

Credits

Photography & Post-Production: Federica Galiero

Graphics & Poster: Aurora Verducci

Photo Backstage: Federico di Malta

Video footage: Same Studio

Sound designer: Leonardo Santini

Text & Direction: Rocco Zaupa

***

The Kashmir Story

Over the last couple of weeks, I have been reading about the film “The Kashmir Files”, its box-office success, its impact and the heated discussions it has generated. Perhaps, after a few weeks, it might become available on some streaming platform and then I will be able to watch it, though I am not sure that I will – from what I have read, it has some very graphic violence and I have no stomach for watching violence.

However, reading about “The Kashmir Files” has reminded me of another film about Kashmir and the Kashmiri Pandits – the film was “I Am” (2010), and it was directed by Onir. I think that it was a good film that merited greater attention. I had translated its subtitles into Italian, when it was shown at the River-to-River film festival in Florence.

The Kashmir Story in “I Am”

“I Am” was an anthology of four short films, loosely connected with each other. Among those four stories, the Kashmir short film was the second story of the film. It had beautiful performances by Juhi Chawla as Megha, a Kashmiri Pandit, and Manisha Koirala as Rubina, as her childhood Kashmiri Muslim friend.

This part of the film started with Megha’s journey to Srinagar to sell her house. Rubina comes to the airport to pick her up and is happy to see her old friend. Megha is by turns, angry and anguished, at the memories the return has brought back. She is unwilling to give in to romantic nostalgia about the city, and maintains some distance from her friend.

During the 24 hours of Megha’s stay in Srinagar, there are only a few scattered moments of nostalgia for her childhood home. A visit to the ruins of her uncle’s home who was killed by neighbours, brings back the memories of her terror of those days when they had abandoned their home and ran away to the refugee camp.

An encounter with a group of youth on the road, brings out that the story of the exodus of Kashmiri Pandits has been changed and retold by the locals. In this new retelling, they were the cowards and villains, who had run away from the valley.

At the same time, Megha’s dispersion of her father’s ashes in the river, brings out the attachment of older generations for Kashmir and their dreams about the day when they will return to their original homes.

Those 24 hours also show Rubina’s changed life in the Kashmir valley – she is lonely, living closed at home and is unmarried, while the guy she used to love has left India. Her brother, who had become a militant, has repented and come home, but is disabled and a shell of his former self. Police comes to their home frequently to check because they are a militant family. The city is divided by barbed wires and check-points, which gets deserted as the evening falls and people rush to their homes.

Megha’s righteous anger and resentment at the fate of Kashmiri Pandits, has one final moment of push back from Rubina. A brief exchange between the two friends, brings out the tragedy of changed lives of Kashmiri Muslims, especially those of the women and youth. The awareness that in the end there were no victors among the ordinary persons on the two sides plants a little seed of mutual understanding.
Impact of “I Am”

“I Am” was a film dealing with other difficult themes along with the Kashmir story. Perhaps that is why its Kashmiri section did not receive proper attention. It had a strong impact on me because in the process of doing its Italian subtitles, I had spent a lot of time with each of its scenes.

This part of the film gave precedence to the view-point a Kashmiri Pandit. It was shot in dark and drab colours. It showed a Srinagar of barbed wires, road-blocks and sad people, and not the romantic town of lake and gardens from 1980’s Bollywood.

The whole sequence of Megha visiting the ruins of her killed uncle’s house, had a very strong impact on me. Its background score was filled with the shouts of slogans by angry people asking all kaffirs to leave Kashmir or be killed. I could identify with her refusal of Rubina’s sympathy, when she responds, “Don’t worry, I am not going to cry”.

The film also shows the impact of the events on the other side, through Rubina’s family. They have also suffered and continue to suffer due to the militants on one hand and Indian army on the other. However, I felt that it was more difficult to empathise with them, because their pain was closely linked to issues related to militancy and its violence.

For example, there was a sequence when Megha is accompanied by Rubina’s mother to a neighbourhood shop for buying saffron. The elderly shop-owner remembers that he had accompanied Megha’s pregnant mother to the hospital when she was born. However, their discussion also brings out that it was that same person’s son who had killed Megha’s uncle and later, died as a militant. Megha comes back from the shop full of indignation – “You only had that shop to take me, whose son had killed my uncle?” she asks bitterly.

While I could see the dismay, regret and frustration on the faces of the local Kashmiris, I also had a feeling at the back of my mind that “it was their sons and families who did it”! I think that is the biggest difficulty when we look at victims of Islamic terror, that we are less willing to acknowledge the pain of its Muslim victims.

The Elephant in the Room

I remember talking to Onir in Florence about the Kashmir portion of the film, expressing my appreciation and saying that it was a great pity that this episode of our recent history had been allowed to be forgotten.

To write this post, I watched again the Kashmir portion of “I Am”. I think that there is an aspect of the Kashmir situation which had remained untouched in the film – the rise of more conservative Islam which was linked with militancy. Traditionally, the Kashmiri Islam has been moderate and open, and it had a history of a peaceful co-existence with Hinduism. Over the past couple of decades, the more conservative version of Islam has become more common, but its role and significance in the Kashmiri Pandits' exodus was never mentioned in the film.

Whose sufferings need acknowledgement?

As far as I understand about the events in Kashmir, the problems worsened with the Soviet invasion of Afghanistan at the end of 1979. To counter that the Americans started supplying money and arms to Mujahideen through Pakistan, which contributed to strengthening of the more conservative ideas of Islam in the region and reached Kashmir through Pakistani militants in the 1980s. Apart from the militants, it impacted different groups of persons, such as -Militants from Pakistan along with radicalised Kashmiri youth killed many Kashmiri Pandits and provoked their mass exodus in late 1980s and early 1990s.

Militants and hardliners from Pakistan along with their companions in Kashmir started killing moderate Kashmiri Muslims and those seen as sympathetic or collaborating with India, starting from early 1990s and continuing even now. Around 7000 Kashmiri “political opponents” have been killed, though some say that the Kashmiri victims have been many times more. They specifically target the intellectuals and they can abduct or rape their families.

Since the 1990s, Indian army has been fighting the Kashmiri separatists and militants and once again, a large number of victims have been reported, not only among the militants, but also among the civilians. The army rule has also affected general life.

Each of these groups have their own stories to share. I have read of Kashmiri Pandit families weeping at the shows of The Kashmir File - they are happy that finally their sufferings have been acknowledged through cinema. Onir’s film “I Am” did not show that violence directly, it focused on its aftermath.

I think that one of the good films about the impact of army in Kashmir was Shaurya (2008), which touched upon the human right abuses.

Stories about the situation in Kashmir involve different and complex issues. The views of the Islamic hardliners and militants may not be acceptable or understandable for most of us. However, I think that our cinema needs to explore these different areas and view-points so much more. For example, little is known about the violence against moderate Muslims in Kashmir and it would also benefit from a greater exploration in literature and cinema.

River to River - Festival 2020

River to River (RtoR) film festival was started by Selvaggia Velo in Florence (Italy) in 2001. It was the first festival entirely dedicated to Indian films held outside India. For many years, while living in Bologna, which is not far from Florence, I regularly visited this festival. Some years ago, we shifted to Schio, about 350 km to the north of Florence, so participating in this festival became difficult for me. However, the December 2020 edition of RtoR was held online due to the on-going Covid-19 pandemic. This gave me an opportunity watch some of the festival films. (Below a still from "Berlin to Bombay", one of the films in the festival)

My main interest was in watching documentary and short films in the festival. Thus, I watched only one full-length feature film - Kadakh. This post is to share a few impressions about some of the films which I liked in this festival.

Kadakh

Kadakh was the opening film of the festival, directed by Rajat Kapoor. It is a black comedy centred around a dead body in an upper-middle class drawing room in Mumbai, which is full of guests for a Diwali party.

Sunil (Ranvir Shorey) is the owner of the house while the dead guy is Raghav, husband of his office colleague Chhaya, with whom he is having an affair. Raghav has discovered their affair and comes to talk to Sunil. He is trying to be mature about it, but continues to get too angry to control himself and during one such loss-of-control moments, shoots himself. Soon Sunil's wife (Manasi Multani) comes back home and finds her husband with Raghav's corpse in their drawing room. He confesses his affair but there is no time to deal with the marital infidelity as they know that soon their guests for the Diwali party are going to arrive. So the husband and wife hide the dead body in a box, cover it with tapestry and get ready to welcome the guests.

The guests include Chayya, the wife of the dead man. You can imagine the comic-horror kind of mixed tension which drives this film. The last part of the movie is its most cynical and damning part, with the whole gang of friends (except Chaya, who has left) helping Sunil in getting rid of the dead body. When the film was ending, I almost expected it to show the whole lot going to the chautha (funeral) ceremony of the poor guy and express condolences to the widow.

I do not like the genre of dark comedy, but the film is well made and well-acted. All the actors are good. I especially liked Manasi Multani, who plays Sunil's wife Malti and Palomi Ghosh, who plays Chhaya. I also thought the guy playing Raghav (Chandrachoor Rai) was good in his brief role.

The Newly Weds, short film (5 min.) by Prataya Saha

You can watch this short film on YouTube. The film has a young man (Mahesh Gowda) and his wife (Suvin Valson) and it looks at the way they relate to each other, mediated by technology. When together, they hardly talk to each other and their eyes are constantly on their mobile phones and laptop screens. At night, a laptop stays in the bed between them. However, they expresses their love in the messages they write to each other, in which they open their hearts.

The tiny film presents the role of tech in a young couple's life as a kind of caricature. I felt that it could have been more relatable as a depiction of a long-married couple who does not have much left to say to each other. It felt a bit unrealistic for a young newly married couple, because it seemed to ignore their need for physical touch and sex. Their messages express a yearning, which is inexplicably missing from their real lives.

Berlin to Bombay, documentary film, 51 min. by Marco Hulser

For me, Berlin to Bombay was the most enjoyable film of the festival. It is the story of an Indian origin boy Abu Chaka Khan, raised in Berlin (Germany) and his fascination for the world of Bollywood. Abu works in a restaurant but his dream is to go and act in Bollywood. He does not want to work in German films where he can only play Indian or Pakistani roles - he prefers the idea of Bollywood heroes with their songs and dances.

He makes and sends his videos for auditions to India but when they do not get him any offers, he goes to Mumbai. The film shows him trying to negotiate his way through the barriers surrounding its film world, full of people who are waiting for bakras like him, selling them dreams and taking their money. Abu pays but finds himself playing an extra in a film. After his dreams crash against the hard realities of the Bollywood, Abu comes back to Berlin and to his restaurant.

Though film's storyline is an old theme, Abu has an expressive face and he comes across very well with his ingenuity, hope and dreams.

While the film ended, I was thinking of today's YouTube and TikTok stars. Now, people with dreams of making it in Bollywood, have some alternative pathways to become famous, even if that fame does not last very long. I think that I would like to watch a similar documentary exploring the worlds of the YouTube-TikTok stars.

The GesheMa is Born, Documentary, 56 min., by Malati Rao

Geshe Ma is the title of a learned Buddhist nun who has reached the highest level of religious knowledge. Rao's documentary is a glimpse into the hidden world of Buddhist nuns. I liked it because it showed a world which was unfamiliar to me.

Though ancient Buddhism spoke of nuns, modern Buddhism did not have nuns. It was Dalai Lama who had established the first nuns' order some 40 years ago. He had also proposed allowing the nuns to study religious books. This idea was discussed in the international council of Buddhist leaders from different countries, but some countries were against the changes. Finally in 2012, it was accepted that the nuns could study to become the learned teachers (Geshe).

The film follows a group of nuns in a monastery in Nepal who became the first group of women admitted to the Buddhist theological studies. The film focuses on the story of Namdol Phuntsok, who had earned the top marks in these studies and received the title of Geshe Ma in 2016.

The film moves forward and backward in time, with some interviews and unobtrusive observation of the lives of the Buddhist nuns. They talk about the setting up of the first nunnery. It looks at their celibate lives, their shaving of heads and their determined animation during theological discussions, where a raised leg-movement and clapping of hands in stereotypical gestures, looked like a dance to me.

GesheMa Namdol talks about her childhood and her family's opposition to her idea of becoming a nun, her desire for studying the Buddhist religious texts and how they must argue and debate their ideas and defend them against questions. The film concludes with the group of the nuns holding the coveted yellow head-dresses in their hands, which are a visible sign of their learning, walking in the room full of monks. They all don those yellow head-dresses, signifying a new beginning of the role of the women leadership in Buddhism.

Buddha of the Chadar, 28 Min. by Jean Whitaker

This film can also be watched on internet. It is about a father and son from Ladakh making a long winter journey on the frozen Zanskar River - a route known as the Chadar. They carry a heavy gold-plated statue of Buddha, which they plan to offer to a Buddhist monastery located at the top of the hill near their village.

The film brings out the solitude and difficulties of the long journey on the frozen river surrounded by beautiful snow-covered mountains. It also shows the on-going construction of a new road by the Indian Border Road Organisation, so that in future, the Zanskar valley will also be connected through a road and it should be possible to complete that same journey in a vehicle.

The film has beautiful photography and makes you reflect on the human urge to choose a tough journey as a part of a spiritual quest.

Silence in the Wind, 13 min. by Gautam Baruah and Ballav Prajnyan

This short film is about a father remembering his son, his desire to see him married and his initial rejection when he discovers that his son is gay. His initial reaction is of rejection. Then he remembers the day when his young son had risked drowning in the river and his desperation. The memory of that desperation helps him to say to his son that he does not understand but he will accept.

It is a beautiful film.

The Ashram Children, 67 min., by Jonathan Ofek

India is seen as the land of spirituality. It has many famous gurus with their ashrams, and followers coming from all over the world to seek their guidance. This film shows a hidden aspect of this spiritual quest - the feelings of the expat children about those Gurus.

The director of this film, Jonathan is from Israel and he feels scarred by his childhood experiences in an ashram in India. He feels that it was a cult which had gripped his parents. His parents, especially his mother, do not take his complaints very seriously - for her, it was not a cult and she was only going to the ashram for some months every year.

She tells him that he could have told her that he did not want to go and she would not have forced him. However, Jonathan feels that saying no was not easy for him, because he had grown up inside that experience from early childhood. The whole issue of obedience to the Guru in the ashram was experienced by him as something absolute, he had learned to not question anything and was afraid to express himself.

During the film, Jonathan goes to look for other expatriate children that he had met and known in the ashram during his childhood. Most of them agree with him that their childhood experiences of the ashram were negative for them. Most of them, now grown-ups, try to hide this part of their past lives and do not talk about it. One of these guys also talks about the hypocrisy of the Guru, who taught the lessons of detachment and spirituality to his followers, but also loved wearing gold, luxury watches, and using costly perfumes.

This film forced me to see how the spirituality-and-guru industry of India can be perceived by young children who are pulled in to this experience by their parents. I had never thought about it before in these terms. For me, many of the ashrams and their jet setting Gurus, who run their spirituality businesses like money-making exercises, are persons who profit from human frailties. At the same time, I believe that some of the non-commercial persons can be great spiritual teachers.

Conclusions

There were some other short and documentary films from the festival which I had watched but they were similar in terms of themes and treatment to others that I had seen earlier, so I am not writing about those.

In the past RtoR festival had been an opportunity for me to meet and talk to persons from the world of Indian films - persons like Onir, Rahul Bose, Aparna Sen and even Amitabh Bachchan. That was no longer possible with an online festival. I hope that in future, after the end of the Covid-19 pandemic, River to River festival will continue to offer the possibility of online participation.

Documentary Film - Allah Loves Equality

I think that I had first met Wajahat Abbas Kazmi, then a young film-maker from Pakistan, about a decade ago, at the River to River film festival in Florence. I had even done an interview with him about his film "The Dusk" in 2011. Thus, when he invited me to see his new documentary film "Allah Loves Equality", I was curious.

Theme of Allah Loves Equality

The film looks at what it means to be a person of alternate sexuality or a LGBTQ person in Pakistan today. It starts with some examples of more accepting views towards alternate sexualities, especially towards cross-dressing, gay men and transgender women, in early Islamic society and in the Indian subcontinent, even during the Mughal period.

The film moves between 3 main strands - 

(1) The traditional communities of transgender women (Khawaja Sira or Hijra communities) and their accepted roles in the mainstream society;

(2) The struggles of gay persons (and a few lesbian persons) to live their sexual identities and their difficulties of coming out of clandestinity;

(3) The efforts of a few NGOs fighting for the rights of LGBTQ persons.

Moving between these 3 strands, the film explores their challenges, alliances and solidarities, as well as, what it means to live the porous and dynamic boundaries of different queer identities in contemporary Pakistan.

The violent reactions of a conservative patriarchal society are shown through a few social media and news clips. There is the vivid story of Alisha, a transgender woman, shot 6 times, forced to wait in the hospital because they could not decide if she should be treated as a man or as a woman and in the end, treated in the corridor of the male ward, in front of the lavatory, till her death.

The fear of violence is omnipresent in the film, expressed in the furtive gestures and anxious glances of film's testimonies. Bubbly, the guru/matriarch of a traditional Khawaja sira community, explains the importance of her traditional role in a soft and gentle voice - there is no other safe space, no space where you can find friendship and support outside their confines. She is reassuring and yet frightening because she underlines the perils of being an individual on your own in a society which does not accept you and can easily kill you.

Bubbly Malik has created a NGO called Wajood (Identity) for safeguarding the rights of transgender persons in Pakistan. She says "To live in a Daire Dari, the traditional home of Khwaja, you have to accept its rules. You get the love and support of a family but you must obey its rules."

Anaya Sheikh a young transgender stand-up comedian or Hannan Siddique, a well-known gay make-up artist, talk about the difficulties of living their sexual identities. Anaya can only be safe as a part of the Khwaja Sira and Hannan must wait for his companion, who is under family pressure to get married.

The crowd of young men dancing with joy in a private gay party or the transgender woman dancing at a home accompanied by a traditional musician are both facets of the same reality.

The lesbian women are a hidden world, briefly mentioned in the documentary for the violence they must face. "They can't even accept that lesbians exist here. To accept that would mean that women have a sexuality. So many women in rural areas are circumcised, they can't be allowed to have a sexuality."

In the film one person says, "It is better to have the traditional identity of Hijra or Khwaja Sira, it has a role in the society and it keeps us safe. Calling ourselves gay or transgender exposes us to violence." However, as Khwaja Sira, the opportunities for living are limited - you can beg or dance during marriages and births or sell your body for sex. There are no other options.

The NGOs, even if they are talking about HIV screening and prevention, need to be careful in what they say and how they are perceived. The film explains the efforts of Qasim Iqbal, who is considered the father of the movement for the LGBTQ rights in Pakistan.

If you wish to contact Wajahat Kazmi and to organise screening of this film, you can contact him through his website.

Conclusions

The parts of the film about Khwaja sira community reminded me of my (limited) interactions with the Hijra and Kinnar communities in India. Though many of the prejudices faced by persons with alternate sexualities are similar in India and Pakistan, I think that in India the LGBTQ world is much more ahead in raising their concerns and sharing their ideas.

The film does not talk of transgender men and other queer groups, showing that probably these groups are without voices in Pakistan and were not available to share insights about their lives in the film.

Some years ago, I had written about Parvez Sharma's film "Jihad for love" in which he had talked about the difficulty of reconciling the alternate sexualities with being a good Muslim. Wajahat's film briefly touches on this theme but does not go deeper. I guess that it is a difficult area to present in a sensitive way.

A few years ago, Wajahat did his coming out as a gay person and has been very active on social media in promoting the rights of young persons, especially Muslims, to live their sexuality without fear or repression. There was a period when I was worried that some radical Islamist group will kill him.

I can imagine that making "Allah loves equality" and shooting in Pakistan for this film could not have been easy. It is a hard-hitting film and shows aspects of alternate sexualities in Pakistan that are usually hidden from public gaze. Allah may love equality but some of his people do not love it. Wajahat has a long fight ahead of him, his film is a courageous step in that direction.

Film credits: 

Made by Il Grande Colibri, 2019, duration 55 min., produced by Elena de Piccoli, Michele Benini and Pier Cesare Notaro, directed by Wajahat Abbas Kazmi

*****

#lgbt #documentaryfilm #alternatesexualities #pakistan #lgbtpakistan

Pink Boy and Tom Girl, the world of fluid genders

When BJ, his great aunt and adopted mother, asks Jeffery, "What would you like to be when you grow up?", he thinks hard and says, "I think that I want to be a girl." BJ, her companion Sherrie and the boy Jeffery, are part of a short film on gender fluid children called "Pink Boy".

This post is about some short films on gender fluidity, about persons who are not sure about their genders. You can look at it as a kind of free film festival on gender fluidity - all the films mentioned here can be watched free on YouTube.

Gender fluidity - some concepts

Majority of children are born with male or female genitals. Most of the time, children born with male bodies think of themselves as male and most of children born with female bodies think of themselves as females.

However, sometimes, the bodies and feelings do not match. Thus, a child with male body may feel that he is a girl and a child with female body may feel that she is a boy. Often during childhood, such feelings can be fluid, in the sense that these feelings are not fixed, and they can change. For example, some children born as boys, who may have thought of themselves as girls for a certain period, as they grow up, finally decide that they prefer to be boys, while others decide that they are girls. Some can even decide that they would prefer to be some times girls and some times boys or none of the two.

These children (persons) who are not sure about their gender are called "gender fluid".

We human beings are incredibly complex and some of us do not fit into any label. My explanations about gender fluidity are only a simplified version of this complex reality.

Short film 1: Pink Boy

It is short film (15 minutes, 2016) directed by Eric Rockey. It looks at the challenges faced by a lesbian couple in raising up a gender-fluid boy. The film is told mostly from the point of view of BJ, a masculine lesbian woman. Jefferey was the son of her niece and she had adopted him when he was 2 months old.

BJ explains her initial difficulties in accepting that Jeffery wanted to dress like a princess and to play with barbie dolls. Then she decides to provide acceptance and support to Jeffery, in whatever decisions he is going to make about his gender identity. Aware that he would have to face bullies, discrimination and violence, she decides to enroll him in a martial arts training so that he can defend himself.

You can watch Pink Boy on the Vanity Fair YouTube channel and you can also check the film website for more information about the film and its background. An interview on the Vanity Fair website explains that Jeffery has now become Jesse.

Short film 2: Tom Girl

"Tom Girl" (14 minutes, 2016) is by director Jeremy Asher Lynch. It is about a seven year old boy called Jake. It has his mother and father, as well as some other persons from his life, including a psychologist, talking about what it means to have a gender fluid child and how important it is to accept the child as he is. Jake himself is incredibly clear about what this means for him.

You can watch Tom Girl on YouTube.

In the film, at one point, Jake's mother says that probably there are many other children like Jake, but we as society force them into specific gender roles.

I think that our process of guiding our children towards specific gender roles starts very early and in unconscious ways. When a one year old son is taken to a shop and if he points to a doll or a pink cap, his mother or father, just shake their heads and instead nudge him to another kind of toy - that boy is already learning that he is not supposed to like dolls or pink caps.

However, having said that, I do not think that all stereotypical ideas about male and female preferences are only a result of cultural influences, at least some of them of them are in-born.

Short film 3: It is a stereotypical day

The 4 minutes long film (2015) by Alex Harrison can be a good introduction to understanding your feelings about some of the issues surrounding gender fluidity.

The film is about 3 mornings. On the first morning, the adolescent hero wakes up, goes out and meets some people on the way to school. On the next day, he sees the same persons but some switch has been flipped and people are behaving contrary to their expected gender roles. On the third day ... you can watch it on YouTube to find out the surprise ending.

Short film 4: I am Oliver

The 4 minutes long film by Moustache Geek (2015) is about being a transgender teenager. The film looks at the life of an adolescent facing problems in school, her desire to be boy and the sympathy s/he gets from a classmate. All these things are shown through the role played by social networks and internet in our lives. The film is a personal testimony.

Short film 5: I am a boy

The 11 minutes long film by Just Sammy (2016) is about a transgender boy and his journey to accept himself. The film starts with Sammy dressing up as a girl, putting make-up, and not feeling happy about it. She does not want to be a girl. She considers cutting the vein in her wrist and committing suicide. Her family has not been supportive and has asked her to not to talk about her desire to be a boy.

Instead, Sammy decides that he is a boy and to live like a boy. He uses an elastic wrap around his breasts to hide them and puts a sock in his pants to camouflage genitals. He talks about his daily struggles with his peers, and his fears and desires about his gender identity. This film is also a personal testimony.

Short film 6: Trans guy problems

The 10 minutes long film by Isaac Eli (2017) is a wonderful film to get a glimpse into the lives of transgender boys/men (persons born as girls who feel that they are male). It is also a personal testimony.

It is a simple film - just Isaac sitting in front of the camera and talking about his problems, like what it means for him to have monthly periods; the difficulties of using public bathrooms and how he wishes for gender-neutral bathrooms (which can be used both by men and women); the difficulties of going to a swimming pool and not being able to go open chested like other boys; the love/hate relationship with binders to hide his breasts; the endless waiting for everything from top-surgery (to remove breasts) to the treatment with testosterone; and his disgust when someone talks to him as if he is a girl or is talked about with a female pronoun.

I liked this video very much. Compared to the other films, this film made me think of so many different ways our genders influence everything we do in life and how that can create challenges for persons like Isaac. I also liked it because Isaac has a very nice dog and I love dogs!

Conclusions

I hope that you will watch the films I have included in this list. If you do, please make constructive and supportive comments under each of these videos. To be an adolescent is tough, to be an adolescent who does not fit and conform, can be heart-breakingly tough.

Persons with gender fluidity issues have high rates of depression, suicides, alcoholism and substance abuse. Often they face rejections from their natural and adopted families. They also face a lot of emotional, physical and sexual violence. If you are a parent or a relative or a friend of a person who does not conform to his/her gender, be accepting, be loving and be supportive. They will have to fight the world for a life with dignity, at least make sure that they don't have to fight their families as well.

You can also read more about this issue. For example, the Gender Spectrum website has lot of good advice and information for parents and families on this subject.

All the films mentioned in this post are from Europe and USA. I looked for similar films from India, Asia and Africa but did not find any. Perhaps there are but they are in other languages! If you are aware of any good short films on this theme that are available on YouTube, please tell about them in the comments below.

For a long long time, in the developing world it was difficult to get any information about trans issues. Now, thankfully technology is changing the situation and hopefully more persons will be able to share personal testimonies, find strength in sharing their stories and experiences with others and build supportive virtual communities that can one day spill over in the real world.

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The adventures of the Indian Tintin, Jagga Jasoos

Like every year-end, magazines are coming up with the lists of major things that happened in 2017. Among these, are the articles about the disappointing films of the year. One such article wrote, "Big Stars like Ranbir Kapoor and Katrina Kaif delivered a dud like Jagga Jasoos, a criminal waste of resources that should have never been allowed." I feel bad that Jagga Jasoos did not do well at the box office, but do not agree with this assessment. I think that it was one of the best movies of 2017.

This post is about why I loved "Jagga Jasoos" and why I am going to watch it again many times in future.

Good films and bad box office

It has happened many times in the past that a good movie is not appreciated by people when it comes out. Some times, the film even gets good reviews from the critics but people stay away it. Yet, with time people come to recognise that the film was good and thus, sometimes the box-office failures turns into a cult films.

"Jagga Jasoos" got mixed reviews, but people didn't like it. Some critics loved its magical ambiance, its music and its whimsical approach. But would it ever become a cult film? I hope so!

BTW, the last time that I had really loved a movie, which had received bad reviews and had a worse box-office run, was "Jhoom barabar Jhoom". After years, it remains one of my favourites, but I have to say that it was never "rediscovered" and did not become a cult movie.

Jagga Jasoos story

The film is about an orphan boy Jagga (Ranbir Kapoor), who is adopted by a man he calls Tuti Futti (Saswata Chatterjee) and then left in a Boarding school in Manipur. Jagga's only contact with his adopted father is an annual video-cassette with his birthday greetings. In the school, teenager Jagga is known for his observation and deduction skills and helps to solve murder mysteries - first the mystery of the clock-tower and then the mystery of the giant wheel.

A mix-up of his birthday video-cassette with another cassette exposing an international arms smuggler called Bashir Alexander, alerts him to the danger to his adopted father's life. He asks the help of Shruti (Katrina Kaif), a journalist whom he had helped while solving the mystery number 2. Together, they go to Africa, manage to save his father and to expose the arms smuggler.

In terms of Jagga's characterisation and ambiance, there is a clear inspiration from the Tintin comics.

Why I liked the film

It could have been a regular action film but instead the director Anurag Basu has opted for an animation film kind of approach, with a teenage hero who is still studying in school. All the events in the film unfold in vivid colours, often with a painting-like effect, with an occasional present-past-back-to-the-present swing. The boy-hero has some serious stammer, so he hardly has any dialogues but has plenty of songs (great music by Pritam).

The film has a rich canvass, full of small details, which you may miss in the first viewing. Apart from the saturated colours, especially in the shades of green, the film has some of the most unusual locations including a Kayan tribe village from Myanmar, an underground river flowing in a cave and the relatively unknown Manipur. It even has a bit of Assamese Bihu dance. It also has a rich presence of African animals including a a puma, some zebras & giraffes, some marmots and a wild escape riding on the ostriches. Visually, I found it difficult to take my eyes off the screen.

As usual, Ranbir Kapoor is wonderful and he does manage to look like a slightly overgrown schoolboy. Even Katrina is ok (except may be in the song "Daru pi kar chale gaye", where she is bad). However it is the all the other supporting actors, from Saswat Chatterjee (father) and Rajatava Dutta (Police inspector) to Sayani Gupta (classmate and friend) and Saurabh Shukla (ex-policeman and conspirator) to the bit-part players like the nurses and doctors in the hospital, everyone is good. Sarvajeet Tiwari playing the young Jagga has the right mix of vulnerability and curiosity, and is perfect for the role.

The film's opening scene with a pied-piper like figure leading a row of artists, shooting a film in Purulia, shown in a painting like effect, sums up the film - in spite of the Jasoos (spy) in its name, it is not a thriller, but a musical dipped in magic realism, to be enjoyed with a child's wide-eyed innocence. It did touch the child inside me and that is why I liked it so much.

Though the film has Ranbir Kapoor and Katrina Kaif, there is no real romance between them. Their relationship is more like a school boy's crush on his favourite school teacher, which was inevitable since Jagga is shown studying in a school while Shruti is an affirmed journalist.

Jagga's logic in involving Shruti in the search for his father - "She is so clumsy and unlucky but every time she has bad luck, it brings good luck to me" - is at best, contorted logic. The film is full of such contorted and yet exquisite moments and ideas.

Things I would change in the film

The film should have been shorter by about 40-50 minutes.

The film moves from one episode to another in quick bursts, without really any time to feel the thrills. For example the lovely scene of the Kayan village, followed by an encounter with arms smugglers, is resolved in a one minute long escape down an amazing waterfall gushing out from a hill. Or the scene of the car chase with the shooter who keeps on missing the targets, ends before you understand what is happening. So many scenes are brief and terminate abruptly. A little longer build-up and follow-through of scenes, would have been better. So how could they reduce the film's duration?

The film is so beautiful visually, that I think that if I was in Basu's place, even I would have had difficulties in deciding which scenes to cut from the movie. Still a slightly lesser number of events with longer and more emotion-filled conclusions would have helped in creating a better connect with audience.

Conclusions

I think that Jagga Jasoos will be among my favourite films - films that I rewatch every now and then.

If you didn't watch this movie when it was released, if you have the capacity to feel a child's wonder, and if you like reading comics, then my advice is - do get hold of its DVD and watch it! Better still, watch it with kids.

Note: The images used in this post are from the publicity material of the film.

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Blurring the gender boundaries

Spanish film director Pedro Almodovar’s film “The skin I live in” (2011) is inspired from the 1984 French novel "Tarantula" by Thierry Jonquet.

Almodovar is known for his complex themed films that remind me of complicated jigsaw puzzles where the things are never what they seem and a new surprise is just waiting for you at the next turn. His films also are about sexualities, especially alternate sexualities, and usually have a generous dose of shocking sex scenes. This film also follows these rules.

I have to confess that often Almodovar’s films make me squirm and feel embarrassed. There are times when I wish I could fast forward them.

Recently I watched “The skin I live in”. I found it deeply disturbing and provocative, forcing me to rethink on many issues.

Just a warning for those of you who have read so far – Almodovar specialises in being politically incorrect. Thus if you get easily excited or upset, you might not like to continue reading this. If long and crude sex scenes embarrass you, avoid this film. And finally, if you intend to watch this film, then be warned that this article contains a lot of spoilers.

STORY

Robert (Antonio Banderas) is a plastic surgeon. His wife was having an extra-marital affair with a man called Zeca. In a car accident, his wife had severe burns while Zeca manages to escape. Robert manages to save his wife but her face and body are severely disfigured. One day she sees herself in a mirror and disgusted, commits suicide.

Robert’s daughter Norma sees the suicide of her mother and becomes emotionally disturbed. She is admitted in a psychiatric hospital. One day when she is slightly better, Robert takes her to a party, where she meets a good looking young man called Vicente (Jan Cornet) and they go out in the park. Few minutes later, Robert worried about his daughter goes out to look for her and finds her unconscious. His daughter is in shock, is afraid of men and thinks that her father had raped her. Soon after, she commits suicide.

Robert kidnaps Vicente, keeps him as a prisoner, does surgery on him to remove his genitals, gives him female hormones to make him grow his breasts, gives him facial remodelling surgery to make him look like his dead wife and tortures him psychologically till Vicente agrees that he is now a woman called Vera (played by Elena Anaya).

Robert’s old time governess Marilia (Marisa Paredes) is the only one who knows about the existence of Vera and has some contact with her, though even she does not know that Vera was actually Vicente and was kidnapped. Vera is deeply unhappy and tries to commit suicide many times.

One day Marilia’s criminal son Zeca, who had had an affair with Robert’s wife, comes to meet his mother. When he sees Vera looking exactly like the woman who had died in the car fire, he ties his mother and enters Vera’s room and forces her into sex.

Robert comes home, sees Zeca in Vera’s room. He kills Zeca and throws his body in a swamp. However, seeing Zeca with his wife’s look alike Vera, reminds him of the past and he also seeks sex with Vera. (Image below: Zeca is surprised to see Vera's face)

Vera now starts acting like a woman, wins Robert’s confidence and then when he starts believing in her and is disarmed, kills him and Marilia.

Finally Vera can leave the prison created by Robert and go back to her family.

COMMENTS

I don’t think that it is useful to look for realism or believability in the plot, because that is not the point of the film. However, while you watch the film, it does manage to make it seem believable.

The film does not unfold in the way I have shared its story. It starts with Vera, a prisoner in Robert’s house, on whom he is experimenting a new kind of skin made from pig cells that is resistant to burns. The understanding that Vera is Vicente, comes after about 2/3rd of the film.

However, the film is very provocative and I would like to share some of the things it made me think about.

The punishment for rapists: I am against death penalty, because I don’t think that a state has to kill people like criminals and murderers do. However, for serial rapists and paedophiles targeting young children, I confess that I am in favour of surgical/chemical/hormonal castration.

The film shows a castration punishment given by a father to vindicate his daughter and I have to say it made me very uncomfortable. The film muddies the things about good and bad in different ways – first Vincent is shown as a good looking guy; secondly, he does not rape Robert’s daughter but their sexual encounter is only a misunderstanding because initially she is shown willing for sexual adventure and when she says that she does not want sex, Vicente leaves her. However, since the girl is mentally unstable and emotionally fragile, the whole episode has a big negative impact on her.

Thus, while I watched the film, I felt that castration was a disproportionate punishment for this guy. Perhaps, if the guy was shown as someone older and uglier and had actually raped the girl, perhaps I would have felt differently?

So the film did made me aware about our biases, in the sense that good looking young people are seen differently from older, uglier looking people. Norma's mental illness was another area of bias, it made me look differently at what happens to her in the film.

Identity and gender: The film is about cancellation of the gender identity of a person.

I have read a lot about transgender issues and I have met a few transgender persons. Often, their life stories are about their feelings from a very young age that they do not belong to the gender given to them at birth. They also talk of how this dissonance gives rise to suffering and they strive to look physically and become the gender they feel inside themselves. For this transformation they face society and family’s ire, undergo hormone therapy and surgery. Not everyone understands their desires and needs.

The film touches on these themes from another angle. A guy born in guy’s body and happy being a guy, is kidnapped and forced to undergo hormone therapy, surgery and psychological torture till he breaks down and accepts that he is a woman and is willing to accept sex as a woman. I think that it is much easier for people to understand his suffering. (Vicente in the image on the left)

So does the film help us to understand the sufferings felt by transgender persons by forcing us to look at it from another angle? I am not sure.

Sexuality as a learned behaviour: All the debates about gay and lesbian rights are based on the premise that it is natural to be heterosexual or homosexual, that we are born with our sexual orientation and it cannot be changed.

However the film touches on this issue in an ambiguous way. Vicente, the guy who is forced to change his body, face and voice to become a woman called Vera, does not like to be a woman sexually till Zeca forces him. After this episode, the depiction of Vicente changes in the film – he decides to use his female body to break away from the prison.

But is his sexual use of his female body just a ploy or is it because his gender lines are blurred and he starts feeling like a woman and likes the woman’s sexual role? The psychological change in Vera is shown by her immersion in yoga, both as an exercise for body postures as well as meditation to deal with her trauma - thus yoga is part of his femminisation exercise.

When the film ended, I was not sure if Vicente/Vera would continue to live like Vera or would like to go back to being Vicente (at least in clothes and behaviour, if not genitally) or may be both - be sometimes Vera and sometimes Vicente?

This confusion is reflected in deciding the pronoun to be used while talking about Vicente/Vera – are we talking of a He or a She and if there is blurred boundary between these two as well.

CONCLUSIONS

As I have written above, the film is very disturbing because it touches on taboo issues in an unconventional and politically incorrect way. Even after a few days of watching the film, I continue to think about certain aspects of this film.

If I watch it again, probably I would understand it better because knowing the backstory about Vicente’s kidnapping and forced surgery would give a different meaning to the whole first half of the film.

However, I don’t think that I am going to watch it again, though the film was premiered at Cannes festival in 2011 and it won different awards. Probably they did not find it as disturbing, as I did. Perhaps one can just watch it in a superficial way, as a horror film with surprises and twists in the plots without posing any of the questions I have posed above.

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Queer Theatre & Short Films - DIQTFF

Theatre and films are wonderful ways to create awareness and understanding about GLBT issues. At the same time, cultural events are opportunities for persons to come out, to have fun and to be with persons who understand their issues and dilemmas. Recently I had the opportunity to witness some of the short films and theatre events organised during the Delhi International Queer Theatre and Film Festival (DIQTFF).

This post is about my experiences on the first day of DIQTFF. Let me start with some of the theatre performances of this festival before talking about the short films. The image above is from a performance by the Sangwari theatre group.

ASMITA THEATRE GROUP

I had already heard about the Asmita Theatre Group of Delhi, which was founded  in 1993 by the well known theatre personality Arvind Gaur. During DIQTFF, Asmita presented different performances. I saw only one of these - Pehchan (Identity). It was led by Shilpi Marwaha.

Using a street-theatre approach, actors wearing dark blue kurtas appeared on the stage accompanied by a few drums. Short interactions between the actors followed one another in quick succession, weaving a tapestry of dialogues from daily lives around the GLBT issues. Parents talking about an effeminate child, young men talking about a gay classmate, a young woman wondering about her attraction to another woman, fears of the parents of a gay son, people commenting about transgender persons on the street, and so on. Usual casual prejudices and discriminations.

There was little time to think about the things said on the stage, as one verbal exchange led to another, signaled by a brief beat of drums. The culmination of the performance was in two moments of violence. In the first episode, a young girl had been sent to her married sister's house where her brother-in-law raped her to "cure" her attraction for another girl. In the second episode, a young man was sexually abused by his friends because he was gay and needed to be taught a lesson, while one "friend" recorded the violence on his mobile phone.

Most of the exchanges and episodes of the performance were allowed to sink in without any explanations while a few times, one of the actors provided the context and a brief explanation. For example, as the young girl was raped, another actor informed that a large number of lesbian girls face sexual violence to "cure" them of their attraction for their own sex.

It was a very effective performance, leaving me stunned and shocked. It deserved the huge appreciation and standing ovation given to it by the audience. The direct language used in the performance was very effective. I wish it can be seen by the students of all high schools and colleges.

OXANA CHI AND LAYLA ZAMI

Oxana and Layla are two artists from Berlin, Germany who are a couple in real life and complement each other in a wonderful dance and music performance. Both of them are German but have immigrants among their ancestors (One of Oxana's great grandfathers was from India).

The performance has Oxana's contemporary dance and Layla's music. Apart from a saxophone and some strange looking string instruments, Layla also uses some objects from daily life to create her music including some old newspapers and a cup of rice grains.

The performance was like a dream in slow motion expressing different emotions through sounds and body movements. A few years ago, during the world dance festival in Bologna (Italy) I had seen a group of Italian dancers express mental illness through their dance. Oxana and Layla's performance reminded me of that experience. Usually dance and music are seen as motion, dynamism and rhythm. However, appreciating their performance required a slowing down and focusing of attention, almost like being in meditation.

SANGWARI THEATRE GROUP

Sangwari theatre group from Delhi was started in 1994. Their performance at DIQTFF focused on spaces given to transgender persons in India. Through dances, questions and role plays it looked at the kind of visibility and space given to lives of transgender persons in the Hindu scared books, in the school books and in the classrooms, in science and in livelihood opportunities. It concluded that the spaces given to transgender persons are almost non-existent and when they are given, they are demeaning to the dignity of persons.

Through the loud claps and brazen gestures commonly adopted by traditional transgender persons (hijra and kinnars) in the streets in India, the performance touched on different issues by laughing at them and making the audience laugh with them, even when it talked about brutality and violence. This made the performance more poignant and effective.

Like the performance by Asmita group, their performance was very powerful, leaving questions in my mind about human insensitivity that allows such brutal exploitation of other human beings without questioning the social norms.

SHORT FILMS AT DIQTFF

Compared to the theatre performances, the short films presented on the first day of DIQTFF were less powerful and effective. Most of the short films were not made by professionals. Some of them had very poor sound quality. A few were not very exciting visually, limiting themselves to a fixed shots. Here is a brief introduction to the films shown in the festival:

Darwaze (Doors) by Aditya Joshi is about two young guys, Shashank and Komal, who come to live in a flat. Their landlord's brother Mr Kale and his wife, Mrs Sujata Kale (Sanyogita Bhave), live next door. Sujata becomes friends with the boys. One day Mr Kale discovers that the two guys are gay and live as a couple. Angry, he asks them to vacate the flat. Sujata tries to reason with her husband saying that the boys are nice guys, but Kale does not relent. "In our family we don't have such perversions," he says. (Below, a still from the film with the actors playing Sujata and Shashank).

Few months later, Kale's son comes back from the hostel and has a secret to share with his parents. Kale is shocked and unable to say a word. Sujata laughs. It is a short and sweet film. The image above shows Sujata and Shashank from the film.

Khunnas (Estrangement) by Nasir Ahmed is a short film in Bengali. It is about the relationship between a man and his young son, who likes to dress up as a girl. The man does not like it when his son wants to put on make-up and dress like girls but he is also loving to the child. His girlfriend does not like the young boy and says that such boys are not accepted in the society. She tells the man that as long as he has the boy, she will not marry him. One day the man takes his son to a far away place and abandons him in a market. An eunuch takes away the crying boy. Later the man repents and goes to look for his child but can not find him.

The film is a little melodramatic, looking at the child's abandonment from father's point of view, but still makes an impact.

Satrangi by Ankit Tiwari is about homosexuality and GLBT rights as seen by different religions. Made by a group of students, it asks Hindu and Christian priests their views about GLBT issues and uses a Newslaundry video about an Islamic leader about these issues.

"In the Mood for Love" by ?? - I didn't see the tile of this film when it was shown. I am not even sure about its title, which could have been "Love My Way". I searched but could not find more information about this film. However it was one of the better films of the festival.

This film explored the personal meanings given to love in the lives of different GLBT couples. For example, one story was about a gay couple, Rishi and Bijoy. Another story was about a trans-woman Pradipta Ray who wants to be a film maker.

Five Questions by Mohit Arora is about the TV interview of a gay celebrity and the questions asked to him to explain his life choices and the secret of the mask covering his face. The image below has Mohit Arora and some other members of his team.

I have an advice for the young film-makers - when you are sending a film to a festival, make a Facebook page about your film, provide information about your crew and post a few images from your film. None of the films presented in DIQTFF had any Facebook page and I could not find any online information about the works of their film-makers. The only person for whom some online information was present was Aditya Joshi, the director of Darwaze.

CONCLUSIONS

Though the quality of short films shown at DIQTFF was uneven, it was compensated by the high level of the three theatre performances. Among the performances, my vote for the most impressive performance goes to Asmita Theatre Group.

So many beautiful films on Queer themes are available on Youtube. I think that curators of DIQTFF should select and show a couple of those films in their festival. This will inspire persons in the audience as well as the young film makers to improve their work.

During DIQTFF, Sahil Verma also presented the Harmless Hugs anthology of short stories. The festival was also an occasion to present a photo-exhibition of Alok Johri, "No Conditions Apply".

Later in the evening, well known Bollywood writer, singer and actor Piyush Mishra presented some of his poems and songs, including my personal favourite from Gangs of Wasseypur, "Ik bagal mein chand hoga".

The festival organised by Harmless Hugs was supported by Love Matters India, Impulse AIDS Health Care Foundation and many other organisations.

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